Walking and Watching

As I walked through the city streets of Houston, watching the people as they come and go. The mothers kissing their children good bye for school, husbands kissing the wife off as she drops him off at work, the young kids running around at the park while the mothers pile around, and the expecting couple laughing and sitting there on a blanket as the soon to be father rubs and kisses her belly saying silly things to make her laugh while she glows with life. All of them just so damn happy, no matter what had been going on, or what their stresses were, at that very moment, that instant they were just so freaken happy and care free.
I couldn't help but to dream, couldn't help but to envy some of these people, and pray and bless them as they passed by for what they have. I realized at that moment that it was all I cared for, if I could just press fast-forward and get to that chapter in my life where all that is combined. Where everything made sense, where it all came together, where I had that wife, where I had that kid/s, a place where we were together.
I look at my son, wishing I could give him more then what he has, he deserves so much more then I can give him at this point right now. I realized these past couple of days when I had a talk with him, that I may be a little stern with him, that  he needs a more tender hand to guide him then I'm currently capable of. In the next couple of weeks I realize it is going to get harder, I mean it has to get harder before it could get better. The sacrifices that I will have to make to get ahead, the things that I must do for my son to have a better future, there isn't anything in the world that I wouldn't do to secure a better life for him. Sometimes I lay here and watch him while he sleeps, watch him smile in his sleep, knowing that he his dreaming of fun things warms me, gives me hope that I can save him, before any damage is done.
I can relate to the movie The Pursuit of Happiness so much. The true life story of Chris Gardner is an amazing one, I read a little of his autobiography and it is quiet a story. Recommend any one who is feeling down and out to read it, the inspiration that comes from this mans story is without fathom. The things he went through that is portrayed in the movie isn't even everything he has been through. His sole purpose in life now is to show that your past has no bearing on your future, and that no matter what it is that you are going through in life, that there is no reason for you to give up on your hopes and dreams.
I guess, no matter what gets thrown at me over the next few months, that there is nothing thats going to keep me from succeeding in my mission to provide my son a better life. For like our own line is to inspire each other and give each other hope and lift our spirits is, "Just me and you against the world" Those seven little words always seems to brighten up his moment, brings light to his eyes. With that, I know I will succeed. All I ever really need is my son and the lord, everything else is minor in comparison, and will fall in place as needed.